They'll grow out of it...RIGHT?

So I've been thinking a lot about how our kids get to grow up these days, especially in light of all the social media. Because social media is going to ruin our world entirely. What really concerns me is the forum that has been provided for kids who are just pissed off in general. They may have legitimate, valid reasons for being pissed off, but they will never admit it. Instead, they will start an Instagram account, because Facebook and blogs are out of vogue now. And they will make many of these accounts public, and they will make them look like well-researched, thoughtful places where people can learn and grow in their beliefs.

Lately I've been looking at a few sites that have recently come to my attention. Here is what I've encountered:

• Accounts that claim to tout God's love and forgiveness, when in FACT they are vehicles for hatred towards gay people. And toward people who know, like, understand, or try to understand gay people. And toward people who disagree with them, or challenge them, or know more about Biblical interpretation than them, 
• Accounts that stand up for conservatism and family values, when in FACT the actual purpose is to malign all other religions and countries, and accepting comments that include brilliant comments like "Kill all the sand-ni*#ers."  
• Accounts that are liberal and open minded, when in FACT they are saying that religion and faith are stupid, and they are far too intelligent and evolved to "fall for that shit". Only idiots believe in God.  
• Accounts that are based upon the premise of being proud of one's heritage, when in FACT they are thinly veiled Nazi-propaganda, hating on every single other race that isn't lily white.

So I have been unofficially following a few of these over the past several weeks, and have tried to talk some sense to a few. I am incredibly naive, because I still fundamentally believe that if you speak rationally and logically, and back up your argument with evidence and research, folks will hear you out and show you respect. I am wrong.

I'm thinking about all of these things...and how much growing and changing these people need, and how maybe something I bring up will sink in. I sometimes see my role as the trailblazer for the young ones, the devil's advocate, the cheerleader for critical thinking. It's a stupid role, and it isn't my job. I have many close friends in  my life who I love and adore, but may not share my views on numerous issues. So it's possible, right?  These young people can learn, and begin to be open-minded under my misguided tutelage....

NOPE.  The reason behind it came to me in the shower, and it's sad because it's not a remotely original thought at all.   Ready for it???  The notion of hiding behind a cause, belief, or politics to mask your basic adolescent angst is as OLD as TIME.  Where shall they fit their angst? At school they may get into trouble, at home they may face disapproval, with friends they may face rejection...so the Angst goes Online. Angst Online!  I need a logo with a little stick-adolescent figure running across it. (AOL reference, young hip ones. Google it.) Online is the magical place where you can call the Chinese person a chink, an atheist evil, a Christian crazy, and a Middle Eastern person a "sand n$##er." There is no personal responsibility, no accountability, strangers are fabulous to hate! You don't even have to know their first name or what they look like, you can just UNLOAD on someone and no one gets hurt. But of course they do, because words are awful and the hateful ones get into our heads and they stay there.  The unfortunate thing is that the level of anger coming from the source doesn't diminish either, it grows. As soon as they find someone to beat down until they resort to ALL CAPS CURSING, the anger just feeds on itself. This I can speak to from a personal standpoint in that I have engaged in pointless debates online and gotten really upset, really angry. I always regret it, it's a waste of energy. I am a grown ass woman who has gotten over my teenage angst (mostly) and I still have to check myself in these situations.  These kids have no idea how to do that, they don't have the skills to regulate their emotions because so many of their interactions don't involve another actual human being standing in front of them. It's easy to have the last word if you can type it and log off.

Pissing Off Your Parents. A History.

• Guess what, Greatest Generation? Your children are long haired hippies who believe in free love.
• Hippies, your children will all become young Republicans, Alex Keaton if you will.
• Look out Yuppies, your children will all become Goth. IZOD is gone, stock up on the black lipstick.
• Edgy tattooed parents, your children will go to church and join sororities.

This is a major generalization, and there were of course "real" people that came out of these eras, many just did what they believed and stayed there. However, there is undoubtedly a HUGE margin that did it to upset their folks. Somewhere, someone has done an amazing longitudinal study about this and I really want to read it.

What hasn't happened before this generation is the incredibly unstoppable force of social media, and it scares me to death. Kids who use this medium for their anger hurt so many other people...they never have to know about it, so they never have to learn from it. No one learns anything, they don't come to a place of understanding and respect. I won't give up sharing my opinions, but I'll try to wait until I'm asked. If I share when I haven't been asked and am faced with vitriolic spew, I will stop. I will walk away and pick up a book.  I'll keep my faith that these kids will get some experience, learn some lessons and open their minds, but that's kind of all I can do. Why? Because Good Will Hunting. All roads lead to Good Will Hunting.

You're just a kid. You don't have the faintest idea what you're talking about. I look at you; I don't see an intelligent, confident man; I see a cocky, scared shitless kid.

We all had to live through it, these kids will hopefully get through it too. Everyone does eventually grow up, right?  (I don't actually want the answer to that question.)